Coffea arabica oh how I love thee

but oh how stressed you also make me!

Early last year I became the proud owner of an Incredible Edibles Coffea arabica plant and ever since then I've experienced a whispering nag which enters my head at any given moment, no matter how appropriate or otherwise, and it goes something like this

"Oh my gawd! Holy sh*t! FARK! FARK! FARK!
when was the last time you watered the coffee plant?!!"

It scares the bejesus out of at least twice a week, the reason for this being I have the memory of a flea so even if I do remember that it might be due for water, by the time I get home to so, it I've already forgotten again.This potentially plant threatening situation is also dramatically increased by the fact that I don't have a green hand, thumb, finger in my body, I suspect this is also accentuated by the fact that I'm very easily distracted. 

To throw even more fuel on the burning fire of my remaining sanity, I know that I must regularly care for the plant for at least 6 years, especially if I ever hope to see coffee seed, quite simply because a coffee tree doesn't begin to produce its full yield until its sixth year.... gawd help me... and it.

I'm not daft enough to think I can produce enough living coffee seeds to get anywhere near my coffee consumption, or that I would be able to roast and then grind my homegrown beans for actual use, but it would be awfully nice to think that I could in fact produce some legitimate, started from scratch coffee seeds, if only just for the heck of it. 

Enter stage right, my saviour, the stick of life....

or, as it's more commonly called, the digital Thirsty Light by  http://www.thirstylight.com

"The Thirsty Light is an intuitive digital plant moisture sensor that blinks an LED to alert the user when it is time to water a potted plant. It is designed to be unobtrusive when left in the soil of a plant, where it continously monitors conditions, testing the moisture level once per second."

not to sound excessive (or a complete nutbag) but this is one impressive plant babysitter so read on!

"The circuit that drives the device, called Drypoint, can sense 5 different levels of dryness, causing the light to blink faster as the soil gets dryer, increasing the urgency of its call to action, until it reaches the fifth level, “completely dry”, which puts the device in standby mode to conserve electricity, emitting a double blink every 3 seconds. There is a low-battery mode as well: a slow triple blink. The Thirsty Light comes with a comprehensive and informative user and watering guide, and is backed by a 30 day manufacturer’s warranty."

This little gem of a contraption is my light in shining armour! It monitors my Coffea arabica plant at all times, night and day, hot and cold, sunshine or rain and blinks a little yellow light when my attention is required.

At US$9.99 I gasped slightly, only because that's almost twice what I paid for my coffea arabica plant and when you throw in the P+P to NZ it was well over, but in saying that, it has without doubt been well worth the dosh and I wouldn't hesitate to get one again.  The digital Thirsty Light (also available from ThinkGeek.com: Thirsty Light) is a definite plant saver.

While I was cruiising around Thinkgeek.com, as one can't help but do, I happened upon what is perhaps the coolest [coffee] plant companion ever, and the 2nd item I would like to find my Magic Wardrobe, it's the Botanicalls DIY Plant Twitter Kit by http://www.botanicalls.com. Yep, it's a twittering plant minder and at US$99.99 it's something you can't help but take a little seriously.

"Botanicalls Kits let plants reach out for human help! They offer a connection to your leafy pal via online Twitter status updates to your mobile phone. When your plant needs water, it will post to let you know, and send its thanks when you show it love."

Pretty cool and clever! Once to kit is assembled, put the leads in the planer soil, connect it to the internet (built-in ethernet jack), sign it up for a twitter account then just start to follow it.  Still not sure? check out this living, breathing, twittering plant @pothos

Alas my wee coffea arabica will have to plod on with jut the Thirsty Light as it's guardian, but rest assured should it ever find itself previllaged enough to have a  Botanicalls DIY Plant Twitter Kit it'll be the happiest, twittering coffee plant ever :)

  My much loved, very stressful Coffea Arabica plant, basking in the warmth of the all day sun